Dear Amber Open Letter To Myself San Francisco SF Bay Area Fashion Style Blog Blogger Cocoa Butter Diaries CCB Diaries

Dear Amber

Dear Amber

Dear Amber,

Wow, what a year 2017 has been! You started this year literally at rock bottom. You had to fly home using airline miles because you couldn’t afford a plane ticket, had to move back in with your mom, and you were unemployed. And although CCB Diaries was thriving, you stayed home all day every day applying for jobs and asking friends to put in a good word for you to get work. Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into months. Then, finally, J.Crew of all places (a store that you had never even shopped in EVER) hired you. And although the hours were brutal and your commute was 2 hours each way, you worked your tail off. For 6 months, you board folded oxford shirts, dealt with entitled, rich white people who were two seconds away from getting these hands on some days, and made $400 per week. You were broke (compared to your six figure salary working in finance) but for the first time in your adult life, you were happy.

You also learned to trust your gut, especially in your romantic life. Specifically, that you have to be happy with yourself instead of trying to find happiness in others. Also, just because someone checks all of the boxes on paper doesn’t mean they’re the person for you either. He may be handsome, smart, successful, and charming, but he can still be an ass. You almost got caught up this summer but you snapped out of your daze and reminded yourself that you’re no ones silver medal. Know your worth and then add tax, boo😉

And while we’re on that subject, you decided to do things your way when it came to CCB Diaries. You learned the value of your time and said no if others didn’t. You focused on quality not quantity. You stayed true to yourself no matter how big your following grew. You took breaks when you needed to rest. You stepped outside of your comfort zone when it came to styling. You got more personal and more vulnerable in your blog posts. You found inspiration in places you would have never imagined. Your style also evolved this year and you embraced it. You met and exceeded all of your goals for the blog and it paid off. And now you’re an Amazon Influencer. Whaaaaat?!

At the tail end of the summer, you landed your dream job. You kept getting rejected from good things because God had something better for you. And it’s like Mama CCB always says, “His timing is always perfect.” You found a job that combines what you’re good at (business operations and math/finance) with your passion (fashion). You enjoy going to work every day now, even if it didn’t have all the perks like free coffee and free food. You love what you do and even though you’re not making as much money as you used to (yet), you’re still happy. Your team is awesome and you made some amazing new friends. You re-entered the corporate world on your terms and weren’t willing to settle for less. Even when your parents didn’t understand your desire to change career paths, God knew the desires of your heart. You had faith and you had to try to pursue it. And look at you now? Black girl magic personified. Managing a team. Happy. Moisturized. Drinking water. Minding your own business. From the lowest low to the highest high. What a feeling!

You should be really proud of yourself, Amber. You accomplished a lot this year. And even though you’re your biggest critic and probably feel like you did nothing this year, stop for a second and pat yourself on the back because YOU DID THAT! Now, let’s go get this schmoney in 2018 (in my Cardi B voice)!

Love Always,


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